waves, friends, laughter

"Suffering is like a disease we have all contracted. What we usually experience as pleasure is mostly a diminishment of pain.
If good food or drink, really were just pleasurable then no matter how much we ate or drank, we would feel greater and greater happiness in equal measure.
Instead, if we partake excessively, we begin to suffer in our bodies and our minds. This indicates that these experiences of pleasure have an inner nature of pain."

-Dalai Lama from "The Art of Happiness"


I had to read that over and over to really apply it to my life (and still do.) Instantly I accepted the truth of the statement, that the over indulging I always do reflects my unhappiness. But to change thought and live everyday motivated by an inner nature of happiness...that is the challenge. I suppose it would take years to achieve this, considering how jaded we are, but I think experiencing life less material objects and excess might be the final step to appreciating what we have enough to find happiness in just living.


"Since motivation precedes and drives actions, controlling it is the best way to prevent impulsive and possibly abusive physical and verbal actions. When you suddenly want something and just reach out and take it without considering the consequences, your desire is expressing itself impulsively.
Without benefit of reflection.
Continually examine your motivation." -Dalai Lama...

That's the hardest part- continually. We forget and forget and forget. That and compassion. I have a necklace that reads "compassion" on it, and even when I'm wearing it I forget to be patient with the asshole who just cut me off, or the bitch at the counter. Its hard. But without religion, this is my spirituality and the root is happiness. If we can get to the point where our motivation is true happiness...inner nature and all, I believe we can be satisfied beyond belief regardless of where we are. Alcohol...food....clothes...these things are not the answer. (waves, friends, laughter...?)

I was listening to NPR the other day and some researcher was talking about a study they did on people and happiness. They found that the people that rated themselves as very happy and content with life, all were surrounded by a close knit group of friends. I believe this is true. I have never been unhappy with life so long as I was surrounded with my friends. Just because they are not near us doesn't mean we don't have them. We have to make the best of where we live.


i guess this is my new break

Hello Economy...its us, Generation Y

I originally intended to write about why I and all the early 20 somethings alike, are feeling like shit with this bulimic bastard economy...but in my attempt to be optimistic (thank you blog) I decided to search for the silver lining. Side note- I just realized I can't write and listen to music at the same time because it interrupts the flowing literature I am attempting. cough cough. ha. but seriously.

We all remember the confusion and anger that steamed during our pubescence years, well I've decided that there should be an equally awkward classification for the period following college graduation. Maybe they could call it adulterty, like puberty but for"adults"...hmm, maybe not, sounds too much like adultery. Nonetheless, we are facing similar uncertainty transitioning (or should I say gimping) into full fledged independent adulthood. Can I get an amen?

Now this wouldn't be such a big deal if we graduated when the economy was booming and it was a sure shot to specialize in anything but elementary education or art and have a high paying job instantly (not totally realistic.) But we are entering the job market at an all time low with parents that expect us to have 401ks and pensions and one of those fancy corporate ladders. Sorry I'm such a disappointment dad. Yeah I'll get right on that 401k/pension b.s. that I keep reading in the paper. Oh, that's right, they are worthless now that the stock market plummeted. And why do I want to rely on social security when we all know it won't be around for us Y-ers.

And that's my point. Relax, don't feel the pressure. We're cool. While baby boomers and genXers are watching their retirement melt away, and their savings becoming less and less valuable, our debt is doing the same thing. Yey for debt. Not to mention, I don't own a home...do you? Do we even want to?

This is our chance to relax. Allowed by our financial flexibility (no kids no house no worries.) We're in a no pressure zone and its them experiencing the turbulence. The housing market will turn around along with the job market, like it always does, and hopefully we'll be there ready to take advantage of it. Our economy has slewed around (with the Bush administration) for too long and she is just reaping the repercussions. Unfortunately, her unwanted babies are being adopted by the government (baby big corp.) Yeah I'm pro choice...and becoming less of a fan of the "free market" (there is no such thing by the way...shhhh corporation sounds a lot like corruption.)

Luckily, our fearless leader is picking up the pieces and giving us some hope for recovery. "Generation Y" "Echo Boomers" "Millennium Gen" we're sitting pretty amidst the biggest economic meltdown since the depression. And after the drama of Clinton's fellatio, our country being attacked, 8 years of the worst President in history, and a continuing war, we've been through some shit and no stock market blow up is gonna get us down. We're going to build our riches on the dump left behind after all of this is over. Who's with me? :)

I feel you

Its funny how the smallest things can bring back the strongest memories. Some similarity of a moment in time reflecting perfectly off the future regardless of 2000 miles. And I'm sure my fellow beached whales can understand the web of confusion that boggles our minds when feeling lost at an uncertain age in an uncertain place that looks nothing like home.
I know a few souls...floating in the same fishbowl...that wish they could just swim away to clear blue water and coconut trees. He reminded me. When he wrote a song that caused us to cry and question why. Are we here for a reason or just to be. Misery is not in my cards so I wiped my tear and found those smallest things to remind me of eventuality (i love that word.)
It mostly breaks my heart seeing more of us breaking down from the transition. But all I can say is they are not gone, we are merely existing away from them on a journey to find ourselves...maybe it wasn't what we thought it would be, but if we flood our mind with heartache we'll flush out all the aloha.
back to the beach
I think I'll go jump off the high dive into some aloha. Go swim in that for a while.

Louise and Kahi

Louise is one of the most amazing people on the earth and Kahi is her second. They are on a surf trip around the world, which can be tracked by visiting the site eatdrinksurf. They are an inspiration, not just in living your dream, but loving life and always smiling. I was thinking about my personal quest to make barefoot prints around the world and I came up with this small waterfall of thoughts-

the many variations of the earth
from cold to hot and high to low
wet to dry and dark to light
I'm curious to attempt to blend
adapt, accept. Culture and race
and every difference I haven't seen
in a sheltered America where my boundaries lie.
And although the thought scares me,
I'd like to take a sip, of the
world. so my core will adapt,
my eyes will dilate, and my skin
will shed. Until I know life- of
this earth and grow like the grass
so I'll die experienced.

To start a new chapter he says

It boils down to one thing. And that is happiness. I read a book twice called the Art of Happiness, which was based on 8 years of interviews between the Dali Lama and a psychologist. Never did I finish the last chapters, but it always realigned my positive and injected compassion into my mind, life, spirit, whatever. Problem is that my brain, which operates like many others, works on use it or lose it terms. I think this is why self-help books are such money makers. We need something to continually keep us on track. Groups, books, distractions, something.

So Roscoe is my Dali Lama right now. Completely compassionate towards me no matter how hard I'm falling (on my face.) But he inspires me when he finally stirs up some emotion and lets me in on his feelings. He makes me want to be a better person and I admire his ability to do it so effortlessly, in a very non-condescending way. I talk a lot about my personal issues, which always gets me a lot of feedback on what I "should" and "need" to do. Most people don't understand that you are not seeking out answers, you're seeking out some sort of absorption of your troubles. Roscoe is my willing sponge so long as I can squeeze him out often enough with happier thoughts.

Thats where the new chapter came into play.

I left Hawaii (to escape myself), only to realize my shadow follows me even over oceans. I've moved twice in less than a year, regressing in quality of life (not counting health) and now I find myself in an emotional pickle jar...looking for a way out to a happier place (perhaps a sandwich or egg salad.) Its a confusing thing when happiness and sadness reside in you 50/50. And I let them dual it out for a while but realized that I am the ref of this game and the choice is mine.

So I chose happiness...and this blog is my self-help book/group/spirituality. blah blah blah. Cause I need to stay on track, and no I don't self regulate easily.
side note-who needs proper english/punctuation when writing whats in my head...it should come out more naturally (excuses excuses)